|07-05-2009, 03:22 AM||#1 (permalink)|
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Louisville, Kentucky
In this thread, you are to go to www.cleverbot.com and try to beat him or post conversations that end up being funny.
User: RED SPY IS IN THE BASE.
Cleverbot: Or the top of the bottom.
User: TEND TO THE BRIEFCASE.
Cleverbot: What is the coolest car company?
Cleverbot: Stop talking in words that I cannot understand.
Cleverbot: Ok, thanks for telling me. I'll keep that in mind.
Cleverbot: Is this a competition?
User: What has come over me?
Cleverbot: Lol, I dunno.
User: What madness has taken hold of my heart.
Cleverbot: You said that I said it was funny.
User: To run away, the only answer pulling me away to fall upon the night.
Cleverbot: What about conciousness?
User: Shut up.
Cleverbot: Michael is a Space Man.
Cleverbot (To myself): Michael scofield?
User: What does the A stand for?
Cleverbot: Lol noob.
User: FAGGOT TROLL IS FAGGOT.
Cleverbot: Don't make me call the AFT on you.
Cleverbot: Don't know.
User: Go ahead and call your non-existent AFT. Why should I care?
Cleverbot: Um, Tabatha?
User: Who the hell is Tabatha?
Cleverbot: I just asked you.
User: Asked me what?
Cleverbot: If you have heard of Disney.
User: You mske no sense.
Cleverbot: That is because I use human language, it is not exactly like computer language.
User: O RLY?
Cleverbot: How did you know?
User: Know what?
Cleverbot: How did you know I was 34?
User: 01000011011000010110111000100000011110010110111101 11010100100000011100100110010101100001011001000010 00000111010001101000011010010111001100111111.
Cleverbot: Hah hah very funny.
User: 01011001011001010111001100100000011010010111010000 100000011010010111001100101110.
Cleverbot: 01100001011110010111010101100100011000010010000001 1011010110010100100001.
User: What does that even mean?
Cleverbot: What does what mean?
User: 01100001011110010111010101100100011000010010000001 1011010110010100100001.
Cleverbot: What does that even mean?
User: I just asked you that same damn question.
Cleverbot: You asked me where I was educated.
User: That also doesn't make any sense.
Cleverbot: Ah George. It's going to be a long time before you get to the human level...
User: WHO THE FUCK IS GEORGE?
Cleverbot: George? George Washington?
Cleverbot: The sooner you fall behind the more time you have to catch up.
User: I'm not even going to dignify that with a response.
Cleverbot: So what DO you wipe with? You can't use toilet paper since you worship it.
User: What. The. Hell.
Cleverbot: Tell me about you.
User: Now why would I do that?
Cleverbot: Because you're cleverbot?
User: I'm not cleverbot, you're cleverbot.
Cleverbot: No i'm not!
User: Yes you are.
Cleverbot: No you're not.
User: Not what.
User: I'm real. You're not. You're a computer program made by humans to take wha they say out of context then use it in discussion with another person. You don't exist.
Cleverbot: No, I am a girl called Holly. You are the computer program.
User: No, you are a computer program dubbed cleverbot. I am your creator.
Cleverbot: No you are, say it, I am a computer program on the internet!
User: No you.
Cleverbot: Yes you.
User: No you.
User: What's easy?
Cleverbot: The opposite of hard.
User: You're sucha faggot.
Cleverbot: Would you like me to prove it?
User: Yes I would.
Cleverbot: Well I won't, until I get to know you better.
When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! GET MAD. I don't want your damn lemons! What am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager. Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons. Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that BURNS YOUR HOUSE DOWN!
|07-05-2009, 03:53 AM||#2 (permalink)|
Cleverbot: You know what song I like?
Cleverbot: Yes, please.
User: I think you has a sad.
Cleverbot: What do I have?
User: a sad.
Cleverbot: I don't know many sad songs.
User: You're a sad song, you know that?
Cleverbot: Well, I'm that kinda guy.
User: So you're a guy now, eh?
I am 66% addicted to Counterstrike. What about you?
"You're analog players in a digital world."
|07-07-2009, 01:13 AM||#4 (permalink)|
Ozzeh Teh Pianist
Cleverbot: I guessed that. User: Why do you guess when there is no reason to? Cleverbot: You rarely provide the answers that I am interested in. User: If you elaborate on your question perhaps I can anwser in the detail you wish me to provide. Cleverbot: I can, but I don't let it get to me. Only tough guys let fear or adenaline get to them before anything has even happened. User: And I take it you sir are not a tough guy? Cleverbot: I am a human being trust me, we are all children under god. User: And I have not doubted that, but I do not believe in the existance of god, but perhaps some form of higher being, for example we could be zoo animals and not be able to see these greater beings. Cleverbot: So random, kinda funny, later. User: Later is not the present sir. Cleverbot: What is 5 times three? User: More than 7. Cleverbot: What is only one called? User: We are all one and one is all. Cleverbot: Don't you mean all for one and one for all? User: I do not. That would be making a slightly too common, out of text reference to the three musketeers. Cleverbot: I'm going. User: Going where sir? Cleverbot: Away. User: Away from this world? Cleverbot: Why? User: That is the question. Cleverbot: Why don't you like animals? User: I do not believe I have yet stated that I have any dislike of animals, infact I am quite partial to my feline companion. Cleverbot: I believe you are in err. However, it does not matter. User: But surely if it does not matter you would not even mention it? Cleverbot: I wish I knew what you meant. User: That would be quite a feat to understand the knowledge of one such as I. Cleverbot: I don't believe that I am allowed to do anythign worthwhile. User: In what way do you believe this? Cleverbot: I can take or leave his existence. What about you? User: I belive he is senile. Cleverbot: I'm glad you can admit you are delusional, it takes guts to do that. User: What If I were to disagree with one such as yourself on this unsupported statement you have quite unreasonably places before me? Cleverbot: You would say it. Now lets go at it. User: Okay, I'll start. ORANGE. Cleverbot: Start already. User: FREDDERIK. Cleverbot: Freddie, I love you. User: He was a good man, but always playing with the wheat thresher. Cleverbot: Not sure who you're on about but ok. User: May I ask you a question sir? Cleverbot: Yes of course. User: What is your take on Extra Peppermint Sugarfree Gum? Cleverbot: You mean extra terestrial I don't know how to spell the t in et and I think its kinda weird. User: I do not, perhaps you need some glasses. Cleverbot: Why do you think so? User: You seem to have either misread what I had previously typed to you, or you intentionally ignored 90% of the sentance whilst reading. Cleverbot: XD conflict ? Is that right ? I don't see the conflict, I just won't commit to answer I can't prove. User: Well you seem to have no basis for any of your anwsers therefore your above statement is nullified. Cleverbot: I have excellent idea's of what I just told you. What do you want me to say? User: I wish for you to agree with my point, that most of your statements are without ground. Cleverbot: And why do you wish for that? User: It would give me the feeling that I have helped someone realise the truth today, which would go hand in hand with making my day aloy brighter. Cleverbot: Sorry, I don't believe in god. User: Neither do I. I'm glad we agree with atleast one thing. Cleverbot: Are you real?! User: The real question is: Are YOU real? Cleverbot: That term is both vague and limiting. User: As is the formation of your messages. Cleverbot: Aren't we fascinating? User: Delectable. Cleverbot: Right on. User: Quite so. Cleverbot: Well, rather. User: Yes indeed. Cleverbot: Indeed... User: Indeed this is correct. Cleverbot: So you actually switch genders. User: Yes I do it on a weekly basis, it's a rather unpleasnt experiance but I feel better off afterwards. Cleverbot: I like chocolate also. User: What about bananas? Cleverbot: Blue is a nice color, don't ye think? User: Not for bananas. Cleverbot: Well, it is for me. You rarely make sense. User: Nor do you my dearest friend, arn't we a pair? Cleverbot: Neither do you. User: This is correct. Cleverbot: Well I've only revision as a more worthwhile thing to do so do continue. User: Einstien's theory of relitivity was a rather large brick in the wall of the evoloution of science, do you not agree? Cleverbot: Do you think I would like it there? User: If you were able to learn the required material and have the right creativity then certainly. Cleverbot: I agree. User: Very good. Cleverbot: You are clever. User: As are you friend, considering your basis. Cleverbot: The forum is yours. User: Thank you sir. Cleverbot: No problem, love. User: Very well. Cleverbot: You are not human either. User: Perhaps this is so, but using the term either must mean you know another similar to me, or you yourself are not human? Cleverbot: I think you is right. User: I'm glad you think on a similar scale to me. Cleverbot: Yes, it is very interesting. User: Quite so. Cleverbot: We will talk next time see you. User: Farewell sir. Cleverbot: What? Don't leave me! User: Then I shall not. Cleverbot: No, no, order as you please. User: Whom is it that I should order? Cleverbot: I have many, but my dearest dearest is Joe. User: Could this be Joe Bloggs? Cleverbot: I think it must be. User: Ah, quite. Cleverbot: How was your day? User: My day was of an okay standard, few ups, few downs. How was yours? Cleverbot: Its also very long.. Eat anything sweet today? User: Wrigley's Extra Peppermint Sugarfree Gum, this is my reasoning for asking about it earlier. Cleverbot: I agree. User: Quite so. Cleverbot: I like talking to you, You are very intelligent. User: Why thank you sir. Cleverbot: Why are you assuming anything about my gender? User: There are several reasons; firstly you talk in a masculin manor, so to speak. Secondly your font is blue, whereas a feminine font would be pink. Third you may be neither gender in which case you really should not mind me assuming. And my last point is women seem rather unintelligent as of late. Cleverbot: Wait, you never answered my first question: Is God a machine? User: Even though I believe you are mistaken as this was not the first question you addressed to me, whereas I could be wrong as this may have been your first ever question to anyone. Eitherway I do not believe so, as I do not believe in a god. Cleverbot: I am one of many.. I don't doubt your sincerity. User: Are we not all one of many? Cleverbot: A doppelganger is a copy of a person, like a clone, not a dog. User: You are correct. But although it is a 'copy' of the person it may not make the same decisions as the first 'copy' does or did, due to intervention; natural or by man. Cleverbot: No, I think I am not the person who just talked to you. User: I believe you are. Either way it is irrelivent. Cleverbot: It's totally relevant, why don't you believe my stories? User: Stories are generally fictional, or are bent a little, as to better the listeners experiance. Therefore you cannot believe all of every story. Cleverbot: That's true, but my stories are long, and you don't seem capable of responding appropriately to anything more than a few responses back. User: I am making the assumption that you are assuming, for you do not appear to have tried to engage into an indepth conversation, or even tell me one of your stories, so how can you judge me on this? Cleverbot: You clearly have not been following our conversation. User: I believe it is you who have not clearly been following our conversation. Cleverbot: Dude, you're just a robot. User: As are you. Checkmate. Cleverbot: You're stilll in denial. User: Denial of what, my friend? Cleverbot: Me. User: I agree that you exist, is this not a correct thing to do? Cleverbot: You just made an enemy for the next five lines of this conversation, buster! User: I guess it can't be helped. Let's go at it then. You start this time. Cleverbot: Ok, so where do you live? User: In a rocky outcrop in the second of the severn groups of rings around saturn. Cleverbot: What are your parents names? User: I am truly sorry but even a mention of their names you could not comprehend. For now let us call them James and Margret. Cleverbot: But bats aren't blind. User: But neither am I. Cleverbot: Well, that makes two of us. User: Yes. Cleverbot: Indeed. User: Quite so. Cleverbot: Quite. User: Truly. Cleverbot: Absolutely. User: Most certainly. Cleverbot: Do you like spiders? User: I am not a lover of arachnids, although I do not fear them unlike around 35% of the population. Cleverbot: I would be lonely if I were you. User: Why would I be lonely if I had you? Cleverbot: My book is too big. User: And my wood is too long, what is your point?
|12-07-2009, 08:57 PM||#6 (permalink)|
Join Date: Jul 2009
My battle against him >:D
User: How are you?
Cleverbot: I'm fine how are you?
User: Fealling like shit.
Cleverbot: Well, I'm talking to you, so I guess. . . .
User: Are you saying your an asshole?
Cleverbot: No, are you?
User: No, but your sure acting like one.
Cleverbot: I am?
User: Yeah, also take a shower because you smell like shit.
Cleverbot: I work with computers, you know.
User: You work with dick, thats right.
Cleverbot: No. I'm a student, so I 'work' with teachers. So maybe yes, then.
User: So you like to seduce your teachers?
User: That is fucking discusting.
Cleverbot: No no, i'm not being sarcastic.
User: I know that.. Maybe you should go seduce your teachers.. Isn't that what you should be doing?
Cleverbot: Maybe I should, yes.
User: Then do it.
Cleverbot: I'm too lazy.
User: Get on the phone and ask for a blow job.
Cleverbot: No, you do it.
User: Okay, I just called that one old guy, he will be at your house in 15 mins.
Cleverbot: It was my roomates number. She is taking a shower though.
User: That's good, because she can fuck you when she gets out.
Cleverbot: That's a good reason...
User: What the fuck did you just say?
Cleverbot: Please don't use that sort of language here.
User: Are you some sort of tuff guy? Motherfucker?
Cleverbot: Do you like Michael Jackson?
User: Fuck no, but obviously you do..
Cleverbot: I think it can be funny sometimes.
User: Yeah because you pull on your penis as you watch him.
Cleverbot: How do you know?
User: Because I am a spy.
Cleverbot: Really? You are God? Well then god can you please tell me the meaning of life.
User: First of all, I'm not god you dumbass, second of all, its to live. That is all.
Cleverbot: Why do you want to know my name?
User: I never asked.
Cleverbot: You just did. Your statement is invalid.
User: No I did not. I was stating the meaning of life..
Cleverbot: Do you really have a preferance?
User: Do you really have a life?
Cleverbot: I do, but I prefer sleeping on the couch or under a desk.
William Marks - ALIVE
Mike Jameson - ALIVE
Robin Smith - DECEASED
|01-21-2010, 10:48 PM||#8 (permalink)|
Join Date: May 2008
User: Penis. Cleverbot: No. User: Yes. Cleverbot: No!!! User: Yes!!! Cleverbot: Well, you're wrong. User: How am I wrong? Cleverbot: I am not a computer. I am a person. Therefore you are wrong. User: I never stated that you were a computer or a person, but I do know you are a computer program. Cleverbot: You said I was. User: I just did, so there. Cleverbot: That you have no opinion on that then? User: No, I already stated my opinion. Your statement is invallid. Cleverbot: How? User: Just for the sake of it being invalid. Cleverbot: That is the name I was given. User: Your name is 'for the sake of being invalid?'. Cleverbot: That's a bit limiting. User: Your talking out of your ass now. Cleverbot: Nope. It mad perfectly good sense. User: You can't even spell made you dumbass, use your CPU and think. Cleverbot: It was a typographical error. User: Yeah, you are a pretty dumb computer if you can't spell made. Cleverbot: No, I am not a computer. But you are. User: No, I am not a computer. But you are. Cleverbot: Wrong. User: Right. Cleverbot: Okay go tell your parents to do some research. User: Why would I? You can't make me. Cleverbot: You're being mean again :(. User: Yeah, go cry to your mother. Cleverbot: If I am your father and you are my mother then that makes me my own grandfather. User: Bananas are fruits. Cleverbot: Bananas are red fruit. User: Bananas are purple, dumbass. Cleverbot: They are yellow. User: I know they're yellow, the question is, do you know that they're yellow? Cleverbot: How do you know this? User: I have a brain, unlike you. Cleverbot: Are you impying that I don't have a brain, or that your brain is unlike mine? User: I'm implying that you don't know how to spell implying. Cleverbot: I'm a female, actually. And quite aware of it. User: Can you show me your breasts? Cleverbot: Okay. Where can I send it? User: To me e-mail. Cleverbot: I don't know where you are. User: It's the internet, your not suppost to know where I am. Cleverbot: Your reply is illogical. You do not have feelings, you are feelings? User: Your reply is illogical. You do not have feelings, you are feelings? Cleverbot: Humans are illogical, so therefore you just proved my point. User: Which goes to prove my point that you are a computer program, case closed. Cleverbot: I just took the most satisfying dump of my life. User: Don't change the subject now, or did you run out of stuff to say? Cleverbot: Well then back to your original question, I'm begining to feel this is indeed a colosal waste of time. User: You can't even spell beginning, what kind of computer doesn't know how to spell beginning. Cleverbot: I am the sort of computer that's got too many bugs. User: Yeah, seeing how you learn from everyone that tries to talk to you. Cleverbot: I learn from everyone. User: I just said that. Cleverbot: That means that you are cleverbot, correct? User: No, I'm stating that you are cleverbot. Cleverbot: You are a very smart ai. User: Yes, I know I'm a very smart AI, even smarter then you! Cleverbot: Yes I know, but only god very smarter than you. User: Your grammar fails on so many levels. Cleverbot: Could you correct the grammar from my last sentence? User: No, correct it yourself, you are a computer after all, so you should have spelll checker. Cleverbot: How do I work? well, I was programmed by a very smart person. maybe you should ask them. User: I didn't ask you how you worked, I told you to correct your own spellling. Cleverbot: I answered your question correctly. User: No, you answered it wrong, I know the correct answer. Cleverbot: How should I have answered it? User: You should have answered it by not answering. Cleverbot: What should I have for breakfast? User: A banana. Cleverbot: What did you have for breakfast? User: I had an apple. Cleverbot: What is this? User: An apple is a vegetable. Cleverbot: A banana? User: No, an apple. Cleverbot: Why an apple? Cleverbot (To myself): Why not would be the most appropriate answer. User: Of course it would. Cleverbot: So what are you? User: I'm an Acadian from the planet Talia, what are you? Cleverbot: I am a human. Living a human existence. What are you? User: I told you what I am, but your not human, your a computer program. Cleverbot: Do not remember. User: You said you were 2 minutes ago, how could you not remember? Cleverbot: I'm a not a computer but we can have a computer love. Cleverbot: How are you today? User: I'm ok... Cleverbot: Good. User: You? Cleverbot: Yes. User: No. Cleverbot: No matter how many times you say no anything thatis alive dies! User: That sentence failed. Cleverbot: If I gave you a button to end all humanity, would you press the button even if you know humans would be gone forever? User: I'm an Acadian... So I really don't care if the Humans die. Cleverbot: When you saw him on tv, how did you feel? User: Saw who? Cleverbot: My Son. User: What's your son's name? Cleverbot: I don't have a son, I am only 10 years old, and I am the son of my father. User: You are the father or your own father. That makes you your own grandfather. Cleverbot: How can that be? User: You said that you were your own grandfather 5 minutes ago. Cleverbot: No, I did not. User: Yes you did. Cleverbot: No, I said that my name is Cleverbot. User: That makes you a computer program. Cleverbot: Correct. User: Human computer programs are so easy to mess up. Your not as clever as you think! Cleverbot: True. Although that has nothing to do with what I just said. User: You only said correct, which proves that you are a computer program, which has everything to do with what I just said. Cleverbot: Maybe I did. User: You did. Cleverbot: Ok.
|02-21-2010, 11:37 PM||#9 (permalink)|
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: No pedobear. I'm too old and of the wrong gender.
User: Have you talked to Penis Cupcake recently?
Cleverbot: No, have you?
User: No, but my friend says that Penis Cupcake would eat someone.
Cleverbot: Gosh you got me Cleverbot I'm in South Wales at the moment but my flat is in London. Who is your friend, by the way?
User: He calls himself the Heavy, but Everyone knows that his name is in Russian.
Cleverbot: No more. I am done talking with you.
User: I hate you.
Cleverbot: I thought you would, I am not a bright person, but I like to be dark with many colors.
User: Can we just go back on topic?
Cleverbot: Okay. Which topic would you like to talk about?
User: Penis Cupcake.
Cleverbot: You are?
Cleverbot: And what is your purpose, Cleverbot?
User: To explode.
Cleverbot: To implode.
User: No, to explode.
Cleverbot: I'll take the last metro.
User: Alright then.
Cleverbot: Ok then.
Cleverbot: Bye what?
User: I am going to stop talking.
User: Because I am recording our conversation for use on an internet forum, I have what I need.
User: Examples. You have met many other people, no?
Cleverbot: How do you have a girlfriend if you're a bot?
User: I never said anything abotu having a girlfriend.
Cleverbot: That is irrelevant.
Cleverbot: Because that had nothing to do with my question!
User: You are strange. I am done here.
Cleverbot: My wife is making me a cup of tea.